Friday, May 19, 2006

Outing A Stutterer?

Of course, I'd never do it, but I went to a musical concert of a semi-famous hammered dulcimer player whom I have admired for 5 years (he's only famous in HD circles)...and between songs, he had a very obvious stutter, but it was ONLY obvious to me. He used virtually every trick I use...word swapping...feigned introspection...pretending to get tongue tied...and it was so obvious to me, I was embarrassed for him, even though there was no reason to be. I guess it just brought out my own self-loathing for stuttering.

Anyway, I was very tempted to approach him after and ask him if he was a stutterer...but I had no idea how he felt about it or if he might even become defensive....or flat out deny it. I did not approach him, however, and it was mainly due to the fear that I'd stutter in front of him and then we'd both feel terribly awkward.

Anyway, do you think there is anything ethically wrong with me posting this here and then giving a link to his main website? I have no idea.

Been Awhile

But, I'm still here. Focusing on law school has been stressful and considering our company was "hostilly" taken over, I've been a bit pre-occupied...and perhaps that has been to blame for my downward trend of fluency. I'm going through a frustrating phase right now where I rarely find a fluent moment in casual conversation and most of my tricks aren't helping me out. My son finds it funny sometimes. I don't.

Typical conversation with him:

Him: What time are we supposed to be at the studio today?
Me: Travis called and said we should be there by (attempts a trick to save the word "five"...doesn't work)...he said to be there by...by...by...by...*sigh*....*expletive*...FIVE THIRTY!!!

The cuss word usually helps, interestingly enough, but I don't think I'll advocate that method since it's not conducive for normal, social behavior. :)

Recently, my blocks are getting *stronger* and less responsive to my usual tricks...the ones that used to fool people into thinking I'm fluent. You can read older posts to see what those are.

Anyway, I have a huge exam coming up in June, my son will be starting high school this fall, GAS PRICES ARE SKY HIGH, and work is a bit above the stressful line, so maybe this is all converging to cause me greater difficulty at the moment. I'm sure I'll have a downward trend and become more fluent over time. It always comes and goes in cycles like this.